WHEN HUNGRY, T'IS GOOD TO EAT

Just picture a great big steak,

fried, roasted or stewed.

Oh, food,

Wonderful food,

Marvellous food,

Glorious food.

- Oliver!

That aside, You haven't eaten well untill you've eaten a meal that you made from your own sweat and blood (though I can't quite remember bleeding). Still, last Saturday was spent trying to eat. There we were minding our own business, planning to go out and eat when one of those neighbours who only live inside your TV showed up with a meal; Pasta sauce. His instructions were simple; Warm it.

As I mentally called dibs on the bigger plate, my host calmly informed me that the house was void of cookers or warmers of any sort. We had nothing to cook the spaghetti on and no way to warm the sauce. Bugger! He however quickly reassured me that the building next door had a surround- sound see smell kitchen. So we braced ourselves for the cold, carried our sauce and spaghetti and headed out to find a cooker or try dieing.

On arrival, it was clear things weren't about to get better. No one was home. The only silver lining in the whole business was a tiny puppy called Pombe who'd been locked in but was still content to wag himself from behind the glass door and generally make me wish I could carry him. After Pombe found more interesting things to do than make eyes at us, he went into hiding.

After that, the idea of a trip into town, didn't have the same appeal as before, considering I'd beeen making eyes at the sauce since it and I first met. But there didn't seem to be any other option. But I didn't want to move!!! Sensing my distress, G. I Jane (my alter ego) snapped into action. She made her way back into the kitchen, this time on assignment: Find cooking impliment or die trying. It worked. She , I mean, I found a kerosene stove covered in dust but full of Kerosene. To all the environmentalists out there, I know I was bad, but I was hungry.

Inspite of my renewed faith in God, providence and other mystical things that just are, I wondered what sadistic streak had made Host make us walk out into the uncertain rain, mud and cold.

me: Hey, why didn't we just use the stove?
Host: Stove, what stove? We don't have a stove.
me (pointing): This one right here.
Host: That's a stove(In genuine disbelief)? I thought it was a lantern!

LOL

Later, after the perceived mode of operation had been explained, I could understand how a mistake could have been made. It didn't stop me from laughing at Host though. So finally, we made pasta, ate pasta, digested pasta and couldn't move for pasta. Something about everything we'd been through to eat pasta made that meal the most delicious thing I'd eaten all year. I couldn't remember anything tasting so good!